We got a few notes from the teacher this week. Our son seems to keep getting himself into little spats with other kids his age. But in Atticus's defense, the problem seems to be with his coping skills as he has to deal with other little assholes (wink — it's never my son who is wrong!) Here are some examples, though, so that you can judge for yourself:
1. Yesterday in the library he was telling a friend about a story he read in "Ripley's Believe it or Not". The friend must have decided he didn't want to hear the story, so he (logically) began to hiss at Atticus. This upset Atticus, who got angry and possibly even started crying. Both boys had to get a "mark" on their sheets and apologize.
2. In music the other day, Atticus was sniffling and ended up wiping his nose on his shirt's sleeve. Typical elementary-school behavior when there are no tissues handy. But the kid next to him embarrassed him by announcing that action to the whole class in order to get Atticus to stop doing it. Atticus got upset and told the kid to leave him alone. Both kids had to apologize to each other and have a time-out.
3. The kids were in line to go to another classroom — one that was right across the hall. Atticus was supposed to be at the head of the line, but wasn't, and the girl behind him was telling him where he needed to be. They were only walking 10 feet, so he tried to tell her to leave him alone and just let the class get across the hall. The teacher defended the girl, saying "she was just trying to be helpful and Atticus got very upset." Me, I wonder why the teacher didn't tell the girl to mind her own business and stop parenting (teachering?) her classmates.
When I was in school, I was usually a "teacher's pet". But in looking back at those days, I'm starting to realize just WHY I was a "pet". I was always very shy — terrified to speak, in fact — smart, but quiet. Toed the line and only spoke when spoken to. I am envious of Atticus. His place in his world. He is the star of The Atticus Show! I love that he sings aloud, that he speaks up, that he defends himself against bullies, that he is a talkative, silly, obnoxious-at-times boy! LOVE it!
But the teachers don't ever reward that kind of behavior. This is one of the reasons that I don't go to parent-child conferences anymore (I send my husband): I can't sit there and hear the negatives. He's not "teacher's pet" material. They want to see how they can get him to stop doing all of those things. And they want my help. But as his Mom — who always sees him as charming and delightful and clever. I hope he is always the kind of kid who will speak up and call attention to himself and take over the room. The kind of person who is kind and gentle, but won't take crap from his peers.
I don't think I want to help them break my son like a wild pony. So run, Atticus, run!!
